Regardless, I do possess a competitive spirit. Just try playing boggle with me. But here I am, this non-champion - and far from athletic - mom, spending a lot of time in the bleachers and on the sidelines of a kid who oozes athletic ability. And what do I say to my kid just before he goes off to crush his opponent? Well, I've come up with some doozies:
"Winning is 20% strength, 20% skill, and 60% wanting it more than the other guy." (Of course, I know nothing about strength or skill.) After he got used to me saying this, I would just ask him, "How bad do you want it?" and he would respond, "More than the other guy!"
"Are you here to play games or are you here to win?" I went right down to the mat to tell him this when I caught him playing video games on his teammate's phone between matches.
"Win like a champion, and lose like a champion,"-quickly followed by "...but don't lose." When it's just one athlete up against another athlete, a loss can really sting - and many kids don't know how to handle that loss publicly. At the end of the match, wrestlers are expected to come back to the center of the mat and shake their opponent's hand, then go over and shake the opponent's coach's hand. But often the kid will pitch a fit, throw his headgear down, stomp off, cry, or slap his opponent's hand. The above little words of advice were followed by a simple threat: "If you ever do that, I will come down there and pin you to the mat." It would be pretty embarrassing to have your white mom pin you to the mat, so lose like a champion...(but don't lose).
"You're good, but if you want to be great, shovel." "Shovel" can be replaced with any physically demanding household chore. The basic message here is natural ability will only get you so far. So work hard.
"Our goal isn't third. We're setting our eyes on first." I said this to his coach in front of him at regionals just in case he was thinking about slacking off during his last couple matches. My point was clear that just "making it to state" was not good enough. (By this point in the tournament, I had seen the other kids wrestle and knew Reggie was capable of winning - or I wouldn't have said it.)
"You can have the cookie, or you can compete at state. You choose." Let me make it clear that as a general rule, we don't push Reggie cut weight. But a couple weeks before state, he had to declare a weight bracket - and then the Easter Bunny came. In the days before the tournament, he needed to lose a pound. Self-discipline is hard - keep your eye on the prize!
"Your opponent is not staying up late partying." When you're at a hotel with your teammates, it's tempting to expend your energy late into the night around the pool.
"Let's get third and end your season on a win." When there were four wrestlers left in the championship bracket at state, Reggie met his match and lost. But the consolation bracket was still wide open. He had ten minutes to be disappointed, then it was time to hit the reset button.
(He did.)
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